Flour, Yeast, and Sugar
by Umeko Tsumagoi
Summary: There weren't very many things that Izuru Kamukura couldn't predict, but even he had to admit that he hadn't expected Aoi Asahina to drag him to a doughnut shop after school. Non-despair-ish.


**Notes:** Don't question it!

* * *

 **Flour, Yeast, and Sugar**

There weren't very many things that Izuru Kamukura couldn't predict. So much of the world could be broken down into patterns and formulae, and once he knew those, it was a simple matter of applying them to any given situation. It made the world dreadfully predictable.

But even he had to admit that he hadn't expected Aoi Asahina to drag him to a doughnut shop after school.

It wasn't completely unexpected, of course; she had said that she would come talk to him, and from what little he knew of Asahina's personality, it was reasonable to assume that she would follow through. Furthermore, the swimmer's love of doughnuts was infamous throughout the school. Of all the conversation topics she had pelted him with that morning at the school gates, it made sense that she would cling to that one.

He just hadn't thought that she would take to action rather than word. And perhaps it was due to that spontaneity that he actually allowed her to usher him off campus and into town.

He knew that he would regret the decision, if he hadn't already come to terms with that regret before the decision was even made. As it was, he was simply bored by the time Asahina shuffled him into the tacky plastic booth.

"I can't believe you don't have _any_ favorite food," she said as she placed a tray full of various different doughnuts on the table between them. "Come on, there has to be _some_ sort of doughnut you'll like!"

"There won't be."

Frowning, Asahina plucked a plain glazed doughnut from the tray and placed it on a napkin in front of Kamukura. "We'll just start you off simple."

Kamukura blinked down at the pastry. "I've tried one of these before."

"Well, try it again!"

He sighed, strands of his long hair shifting as he exhaled. The problem with food, as with the rest of the world, was that it was predictable. If the enjoyment of food was derived from anticipation of its taste, then it was simply impossible for Kamukura to experience. The sight and smell of food, the feel and texture, even the weight in his hands as he held it—he would instantly analyze all of it, no matter what sort of food item it was. Without even trying, Kamukura would immediately know the ingredients and cooking methods, every single detail that went into preparing the food; even if he didn't, there were only so many flavor profiles that any rational person would utilize. Before the food even reached his lips, Kamukura would know exactly what sort of taste to expect.

Eating was boring. If it weren't essential for human survival, he would never bother with it at all.

Upon hearing that explanation, Asahina's eyes grew nearly as big as the Bavarian cream doughnut in her hands. "That's why you don't have a favorite food? You don't even like to eat doughnuts?"

"In terms of lasting fullness from caloric intake, doughnuts rank quite poorly." Kamukura broke off a small piece of his glazed doughnut and placed it in his mouth. Yes, exactly how he expected it to taste. How boring. "If one must eat, there are much more worthwhile foods to choose."

Asahina pouted. "Now you're sounding like Nidai."

"The Ultimate Team Manager? I'd think an athlete like yourself should take his advice to heart."

"Well yeah, but...!" The swimmer huffed, took a bite of her pastry, then swallowed before continuing. "It's just... _I_ think doughnuts are worth eating."

"You're allowing personal bias into the equation," he pointed out.

"So? What's wrong with that?"

Kamukura paused to consider her question. "There's nothing wrong with it," he decided. "It's a perfectly human tendency."

"See?" Asahina crossed her arms and sat back in the booth, smiling triumphantly. "So can you really say that you don't have a favorite food? You're human too, you know. Don't tell me your talents include being the Ultimate Neutral Party."

He stared at her silently. Perhaps he could be considered a neutral party... but it was more that having a personal preference required having an interest in something. There _wasn't_ anything Kamukura found interesting. What curiosities were there to be found in a boring, predictable world?

When he didn't answer by the time Asahina had finished eating her doughnut, she sighed. "Nothing?"

"No," he said simply, deciding that elaboration would be more trouble than it was worth.

"Oh well." She shrugged, then turned her attention back to the tray of sweets. "At least I got you to talk a lot more than this morning. I didn't even have to consult the list of conversation topics I came up with during lunch! Here, try this one." She picked out a chocolate frosted cruller and placed it atop the remains of Kamukura's glazed doughnut.

Kamukura stared disinterestedly at the cruller, making no move to pick it up. "What benefit is there to be gained in making such a list? If you ended up not using it, you only wasted your time."

"I'll use it later. Like I said this morning, it's really hard to get you talking!"

"You intend to speak with me more after this?"

"Well, yeah. Oh hey!" Asahina leaned forward in her seat suddenly, her eyes glittering with inspiration. "I'll share the list with Nanami-chan and the other girls in your class too! Or even better, I'll post it on the school bulletin board for anyone else who wants to talk to you!"

Kamukura blinked at her rapidly, grappling with traces of what might very well be something approaching bemusement. "That's irrational. Please don't do that."

"Don't worry about it!" She waved him off before grabbing a maple doughnut from the pile. "By the way, I hope you have the Ultimate Fast Metabolism."

He tilted his head just slightly, finding he had to make a conscious effort to analyze her train of thought. "What are you talking about?"

"The doughnuts, of course! I'm leaving these all for you!"

Kamukura looked at the doughnuts; there were 14 left on the tray, exactly 457 grams of flour, yeast, and sugar. He turned his attention back to Asahina as she stood from the table. "Weren't you going to eat these? They're your favorite food."

" _All_ of them? No way!" Asahina shook her head, face aghast. "I've got evening swim practice in half an hour, I can't eat all that before then! You can have them. Maybe you'll discover a favorite food!"

At a loss for words, Kamukura couldn't do more than stare at her.

Asahina grabbed her sports bag from the booth, then shot him a grin and stuffed the maple doughnut in her mouth before dashing towards the exit. "I'll talk to you later, Kamukura!"

The bell above the bakery door jingled merrily as she left, and when the sound faded, Kamukura turned once again to the tray of pastries.

Once again, Aoi Asahina had acted outside his predictions.


End file.
